Episode #31 Monthly Goals to Increase Connection

Episode 39: Monthly Goals for Connection

Marriage is a complex situation surrounded by moving parts that impact multiple areas of the relationship… and with kids, careers and everyday life, having a simple FUNDAMENTAL resource to help us win is both imperative and enjoyable.

You hear people talk about date night…  and what that really is, is an ACTION strategy to keep us connected and interact outside of our family business.

Think about it -  Most of us have multiple facets to our relationship:

• Careers
• Finances
• Accidents
• Injury
• Health Issues
• Kids
• Parents
• In-Laws

Research tell us when WE are moving forward and HITTING a goal, we feel better about ourselves. When we share this experience with our partner, it can add depth to the relationship.

 

Monthly Goal Setting (MGS) Action Plan:

On Your Own or with your Partner:

• Write down on paper things you would like to accomplish or things you have been thinking about doing for a while.
• Write them all down.
• You are going to pick two goals:
  • The first goal is you MUST goal.  This is what you MUST accomplish this month.  Could be a project (building a deck), could be an activity (taking my daughter to see her Taylor Swift).. could be a personal activity - (working out 3x per week) or (reading to my kids every night). 

• • The 2nd goal is a goal you would like to accomplish. Maybe it’s something you’ve been thinking about, yet you haven’t taken any action yet.
    • Break that GOAL down into doable action steps.
    • Example: Goal - Build a back porch.  Doable action steps moving toward could be:
      • Make an inventory of all the supplies I”ll need to get started next month
      • Find out the cost - making inventory of supplies.
    • GET A NEW JOB
      • This month’s goal… get my resume together to I can get my name out there next month.

 

So, you have 2 goals. ONE MUST goal and one goal you are moving toward, yet that goal is broken down into doable steps.

If you do this together, you can put on some music… have some wine and make it a 60-minute project together. Have some fun with it.

If you are doing it alone…  then get together with your partner and go through your plan.

At the end of the month… it does a few things:

• Gives you sense of accomplishment
• Self-Esteem goes up
• Have a deeper connection with your partner.
• Become their support system or cheerleader
• Share your results with your kids… learning experience.

Action Plan:

1. Set up MGS Action Plan with your spouse.  Do it now. You don’t have to wait for the start of the month.  You can do it now… and do a 2-week version.
2. Get together and walk through your MGS Action plan. 
3. Be OPEN and Vulnerable.  Let down the guard!
4. Be positive
5. Encourage if necessary yet DON’T check up on them. No Nagging
6. Celebrate successes
7. Talk about it when you fall short.

 

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